#and then i waited until the second trimester and the visit with the obgyn to find out and then i waited for kane to get home from work

[pxlheaux]

SURPISEEE SHAWTYYYY. If they thought they had their hands full with Karter, they definitely were about to have their hands full now.

Pray for their sanity. It’s out the door.

[suituuup]

pieces - chapter twelve

Five years ago, Chloe dropped off the face of the Earth. Beca didn’t expect to see her again dancing in a strip club, out of all places.

rated: E (drug use and emotional abuse in early chapters)

ao3 link

*

Chloe was surprised to hear music drifting through the apartment when she got home from her late-afternoon NA meeting that Thursday evening. 

It had been four days since they had come back from Oregon, and Beca had spent most of her time at the label, often coming home after Chloe was down for the night and leaving before she was up. She always left a note and texted Chloe throughout the day to check on her, but Chloe could tell something was off. 

She rounded the corner to find Beca cooking at the stove, and smiled. “Hi.”

“Hey you,” Beca greeted with a matching smile. “You hungry? Making a stir-fry.” 

“Starving. This baby is making me eat for three,” Chloe mumbled as she walked past Beca to pluck a bottle of sparkling water from the fridge. She uncapped it and took a sip, leaning against the counter. “Are you alright? I couldn’t help but notice you’ve seemed off since we got back.” 

Beca nodded. “Yeah, I’m fine. I uh,” she cleared her throat as she reached for two plates in the cupboard over her head. “I broke up with Sarah the other night.” 

Chloe’s eyes popped wider in shock. “Oh.”

Beca set both plates on the island, then opened the cutlery drawer. “Yeah… and I kinda threw myself into work, because that’s what I do to cope with my emotions.” She grimaced again, meeting Chloe’s eyes. “I’m sorry I haven’t been around much.” 

Chloe shook her head. “No, no, it’s okay. I’m sorry, Bec.” She wondered what the reason for the break-up was, but she doubted Beca wanted to get into that. “Are you sure you’re okay?” 

“Thanks. Yeah. It’s, um, life, right?” She shrugged a little as she turned off the stove. “We just weren’t looking for the same thing.” 

Chloe nodded slowly, then pushed off the counter. “Okay. I’m here if you wanna talk, alright?” She hitched her thumb over her shoulder. “I’m just going to freshen up, I’ll be back in a couple of minutes.” 

Beca had scooped food into each plate and poured water into two glasses when she got back clad in comfier clothes, and Chloe perched herself on the stool across from Beca. 

“Thanks for making dinner,” she murmured as she dug in.

“No problem. Did your NA meeting go okay?” Beca asked as she stabbed a couple of vegetables with her fork. 

Chloe chewed and swallowed, then took a sip of her water. “Yeah, it went fine. My sponsor is amazing. We’re meeting for coffee tomorrow morning. Well, tea for me.” Decaf just wasn’t the same. 

“Cool.” Beca smiled. “I was thinking we could get a start on the nursery soon? Have you thought of a color for the walls?”

“You wanna paint the walls?” Chloe asked in surprise. “We don’t have to do that, you know. I don’t want you to be stuck with a nursery-looking room once Bean and I move out.” 

Beca shrugged. “I have another guest room, and I kinda want Bean to have their own room whenever you guys come to visit.” 

Chloe’s heart swelled against her ribs. She wasn’t sure what she had done to deserve someone like Beca back in her life, but she wasn’t going to screw it up this time around. And she had thought about what she wanted Bean’s nursery to look like, but didn’t allow herself to daydream about it until now. “I like those beige walls the way they are, but I was thinking of a woodland theme? Something gender-neutral, for sure. A few animal frames, maybe an animal mobile above the crib?” 

“That sounds nice,” Beca said, smiling. “Are you going to find out the sex at your next appointment?” 

“I think so, yeah.” 

“That’s the 26th at 3, right?” Beca asked, surprising Chloe once more. Upon catching her look, Beca added, “I wrote it down in my planner.” 

It was one thing to have written down, another to remember it off the bat like that, but Chloe didn’t even know why she was surprised. Beca had been nothing short of amazing since Chloe decided to keep the baby, between keeping track of the baby’s growth on her app or making sure to pick up ginger ale every time she went grocery shopping.

“Oh. Yeah, the 26th at 3.” 

As Chloe further settled into her second trimester, her constant exhaustion gradually faded away. She felt more energized from the start of her fifteenth week, which felt like a breath of fresh air. As her OBGYN saw nothing against it, she started each day with a morning fitness walk followed by a yoga session, then settled down to have some breakfast as she read her book. After lunch, she either had a therapy session or an NA meeting, except for Wednesdays and over the weekend. 

The cravings were still there, sitting somewhere at the back of her mind, but she continued pushing through, for the baby’s sake first and foremost, but also because she didn’t want to disappoint her support system and risk losing them forever if she did fall back into old habits. The taunting was strong, every time she walked in front of the liquor store or a familiar street corner where she would get the good stuff, but she resisted, and never hesitated to call Aubrey or her parents when her resolve wobbled a bit too much for her liking. 

“Shit,” Chloe muttered as she tried buttoning her pants up, her more than noticeable belly getting in the way. She had just reached 17 weeks, and her bump seemed to have popped a little more overnight. So had her boobs. She could also start to feel some movement going on in there, which was absolutely mind-blowing. 

Not ready to accept defeat yet, Chloe grunted at the effort of bringing these two stupid pieces of fabric closer together, exhaling with a sigh when they didn’t budge. 

“Chlo?” Beca called out, a knock on Chloe’s bedroom door following. “We should get going.” 

“I know, I just-- can’t get my pants to button,” Chloe muttered with a huff. 

A pause. “Can I come in?” 

“Yeah.” 

The door was pushed open, and Beca appeared, leaning against the frame. 

She Beca looked amused, causing Chloe to glare at her. “Maybe wear a dress?” 

Chloe’s nose wrinkled. “I only have stripper dresses.” That she should definitely donate, or get rid of. 

Beca hummed. “Mesh shorts?” 

“I guess, yeah.” 

“We can go buy some stuff after your appointment if you want?” Beca suggested as Chloe wrestled out of her jeans and slid on a pair of shorts Beca lent her. 

“Yeah, definitely.” She needed bras, too. “Okay, I’m ready.” 

As her last ultrasound at 13 weeks, Chloe didn’t have to change when they got there, and she laid down on the cot as they waited for the tech to come in. Beca stood by her side, scrolling through her phone. 

“So the Bellas’ results are in: 6 say boy, 4 say girl. I said girl.” 

Chloe had broken the news to the girls when they came back from Oregon and had once again received nothing but support. Bets started coming in over the gender, the due date, and whether Bean was going to come out with ginger hair. 

Chloe chuckled as she rubbed her bump with her palm. “You only said girl because I told you I felt like it was a girl.” 

Beca smirked. “They don’t have to know that.” Her expression softened as she pocketed her phone. “You excited to find out?” 

“Yeah,” Chloe breathed out. She was more anxious to hear about how Bean was doing and braced herself for bad news. 

“Hi there,” the tech greeted as she came in. “How are you doing, Chloe?” 

“Good. Hungry all the time.” 

The other woman laughed as she rolled the ultrasound machine closer. “Let’s take a look at that baby. Can you lift your top up for me and lower your shorts a little bit?” 

Chloe did so, reaching for Beca’s hand as the tech squirted some of that cold gel onto her tummy. 

“Alright, let’s see…” the woman drawled out as she moved the wand until she got the perspective she wanted. “Here we go.” 

“Oh, they got so big,” Chloe murmured in awe. 

“They’re moving around quite a bit,” the tech observed with a smile, pointing at the baby’s kicking legs. 

Beca gasped and tore her eyes away from the screen to glance at Chloe. “Can you feel that?” 

“Yeah,” Chloe confirmed, blinking back the tears pricking behind her eyes. “Feels like butterflies taking off in my belly.” 

“Strong heartbeat,” the tech continued. “Baby’s in the perfect position to tell their gender if you want to know?” 

“Yes, please,” Chloe said with a nod. 

“Looks like you’re having a baby girl, Chloe.” 

“A girl?” Chloe croaked out, a lump rising to her throat. The gender didn’t matter to her but knowing made it feel a thousand percent more real. She felt a squeeze to her hand and found Beca smiling down at her. “We’re in trouble. I was a handful as a kid.”

Beca chuckled. “If she has your eyes, I definitely am in trouble. Won’t be able to say no to anything she asks for, I’m warning you now.” 

The way they talked, it almost sounded like they were going to raise Bean together, and Chloe’s heart did another funny thing. Over the last couple of weeks, she had been experiencing weird feelings for Beca that went beyond the friendship line, but she was convinced it was just her hormones acting up like they did with her libido. Chloe felt aroused pretty much all the time, it was getting ridiculous. She also cried in front of a Budweiser commercial because the puppies were cute, so her body and emotions were definitely out of whack. 

The doctor came in shortly after, easing Chloe’s worries when she assured her the baby looked healthy, with normal measurements all around. They scheduled another ultrasound four weeks from now, and she and Beca were on their way with three copies of the ultrasound, one for Chloe, one to put on the fridge, and one Beca requested to store in her wallet. 

Beca drove them to Target next, and instead of heading to the maternity clothing section, Chloe went straight for the baby stuff, pulling a chuckle from Beca as she pushed the cart alongside. 

“Okay, I wanna buy everything,” Chloe mused aloud as she put a onesie back on the rack, even though she found it adorable.

“I know you’re still uncomfortable with it, but please don’t restrain yourself because it’s my money,” Beca said, as though reading Chloe’s thoughts. “I haven’t really had anyone to spend it on, so it’s my pleasure to get Bean whatever they need. Crib, car seat, changing table, stroller, clothes… you name it.” She smirked, nodding towards the rack. “So get that rainbow onesie, because it’s the cutest fucking thing I’ve ever seen.” 

Chloe giggled and nodded, her eyes shining with unspoken gratitude before she reached for the onesie. It was scary to think of how small her baby girl was going to be as a newborn, and Chloe was so glad she wasn’t doing this on her own. 

She selected five more, all animal-themed ones, then moved onto shirts and pants, showing Beca what she thought was cute to get her avail. She kept in mind that the Bellas and her parents were probably going to go overboard with gifts and paced herself on the quantity of stuff she dropped into the cart. 

“I feel like we should get the crib, stroller, and car seat from like, a special store?” Beca chimed in as they strolled through the blankets/swaddles section. She scrunched up her nose. “I don’t think I trust Target brands when it comes to sturdiness. I actually strumbled across a car seat that looks amazing, it goes from that to a stroller in just a few folds and clicks.” 

Chloe cast her an amused look. “How did you stumble across that, exactly?” 

Beca’s cheeks reddened. “By looking up the best strollers on the market.” She cleared her throat when Chloe giggled. “I just have a lot of time to kill on the subway.” Another grimace. “Is that too invasive?” 

Chloe shook her head, reaching out to rest her hand on Beca’s forearm. The contact of her skin under her fingertips made Chloe swallow as her body immediately reacted. Freaking hormones. “Not at all. I promise.” 

Chloe managed to walk away from the baby part of the store before she bought the whole thing, and headed to the maternity wear, buying a couple of jeans with an elastic waistband, a belly band, a few bras, and a pregnancy pillow. 

“Your total is $843,50,” the cashier announced once he had rung everything up, and Chloe swallowed thickly, glancing at Beca with slightly wider eyes. 

“It’s fine, Chlo,” Beca insisted as she swiped her credit card through the device. She thanked the cashier and grabbed most of the bags, letting Chloe carry the two lighter ones. Everything easily fit into Beca’s large trunk, and Chloe slid in the passenger seat, buckling up. “Any particular craving for dinner? We can stop for take-out on the way home,” Beca said as she slid her sunglasses over her nose before pulling out of their parking spot.

“I could go for a burger and fries. And a milkshake.” 

Beca grinned. “Cool, I’ll stop at Shake Shack.” 

Once they got home, they hauled everything upstairs and stored it in the nursery for now, and Chloe changed into sweatpants and Beca’s Bellas hoodie which she had never given back, picking an episode of The Office for them to watch. 

“Oh, I forgot,” Beca said after they were done eating, pushing to her feet. “Stay put.” 

Chloe did as she was told, giving Beca a curious look when she walked back to the couch with a package. Setting her milkshake on the coffee table, Chloe plucked it from her hands. “What’s this?” 

“A little something for Bean,” Beca murmured as she sat back down beside her, folding one leg underneath and hugging the other to her chest. “I ordered it when we got back from Oregon and forgot to give it to you.” 

Chloe ripped the tape over the opening and peered inside, fishing the box out. “Belly headphones?” She asked even though that’s what it said on it, her voice wavering slightly as emotions once again rose to her throat. She could blame that on the hormones too, right? 

Beca nodded. “I read that babies can hear from 18 weeks on, and I thought it would be cool if Bean listened to music before she’s born. And you know nobody takes picking out a pair of headphones as seriously as I do, so I thought I was the right guy for the job.” 

A watery chuckle burst past Chloe’s lips. “This is amazing. Thank you.” She leaned forward to hug Beca, holding her tight. Her scent did another number on Chloe, and she inhaled sharply, willing her body to chill out as she backed away. “For this, and for today…” She couldn’t remember the last time she had smiled so much. “I really don’t know what to say besides thank you.” 

“You’re welcome, Chlo,” Beca said, a soft smile curving her lips. “I’m just happy you’re finding your way back step by step.” 

Chloe nodded, exhaling. The light at the end of the tunnel was just in sight, and while it was another long way to reach it, she felt like she could, and that on its own felt like a victory. 

[atlafan]

My Everything - Part Eleven

A Take it Slow Sequel

What happens with Harry and Y/N after he proposes? How will the two navigate the engaged life while also continuing to juggle their jobs, friends, and families? Let’s find out.

Warnings: Fluff and Smut! 5K

Masterpost

“Oh my god.” You say and turn to him. “Oh my god!”

“Oh my god!” He squeals and picks you up to spin you around. “We’re gonna have a baby!” He sets you down carefully. “Okay, from this point on, this house is a no stress zone. You’re not lifting a finger, I’ll-“

“Harry, Harry!” You put your hands up. “Please, it’s okay. Don’t spiral.” You giggle. “We need to make an appointment with my OBGYN first, take a proper test. She can tell me how far along I am.”

“I wonder if it was the night in your office.” He smirks. “Pumped yeh good that night.”

“Jesus.” You swat an arm at him and wipe some tears from your eyes. “I’ll call tomorrow to see when they can squeeze me in.” He grabs your face and kisses you over and over again.

“Thank you for waiting until I got home. I couldn’t cancel on that client.” You both walk out to the living room and he sees the papers from the university on the coffee table. “What’s all this, lovie?” You both sit down on the couch.

“Well…Dr. Harrison, who I met with today, told me there’s going to be an open position in the Communication Department for the spring semester. She wants me to consider applying. The position is going to open at the end of the month.”

“So it’s not a guarantee if you get it?”

“Something tells me it would be a formality. I was looking over everything, and I’d be able to take classes for free after my first six months, I could go for my PhD.”

“That would be amazing!”

“But where does a new baby fit into all of this?”

“Well, think of how much easier it would be for you to take time off. You may not even need to work every day of the week.”

“I don’t think you get that privilege as a junior faculty.”

“Still, plus you’d have summers off, right?”

“Yeah, major upside. Plus, the winter break is like six weeks long.”

“Oh my god, think of how much time we could spend in London with my mum. The baby would really be able to spend time with her.”

“I know! I was looking over the benefits and they’re actually better than Mark It’s. I think I’m ready for the change. I could at least apply and see what happens, right?”

“Yeah, I think it’s a great idea.”

“If I have this baby when I think I will, I wouldn’t need to use the maternity leave right away because I’d be off contract for the summer, so I could just teach online next fall or use it then.”

“Look at you finding the loopholes already.” He smirks. “I’m really proud of you, this is huge.”

“It just feels right, I think. I mean, Niall’s about to leave, him and Sarah live in their house now, and they’re engaged. I feel like we’re all forming our own little lives and growing up more and more. Rachel even said she was thinking of proposing to Mariah soon, Isaac and Seth seem to be moving in that direction just the same. I don’t wanna get stuck in the past, you know?”

“No, I get it. I think this could be a really good move for you, for us.” He puts his hand on yours. “Apply, see what happens. Stay in contact with Dr. Harrison too, she could help you with the application or coach you through the interview.”

“I’m gonna talk to the doctor too, all of this could add so much stress…but I appreciate you being so supportive.”

“Always.” He takes your hand and kisses it. “I can’t believe that test said pregnant on it. I’m so happy.”

“Me too, babe.”

//

The next day at work you were in the middle of a meeting when you had to get up to leave. You rushed down the hall to the bathroom and threw up. Niall rushed after you to make sure you were okay.

“I won’t come in unless yeh need me to.” He says from outside the door.

“I’m fine!” You get up and rinse your mouth out. You open the door and see the concerned look on his face.

“Are you sick?” He gives your back a little rub.

“Not in the way you think…we’re keeping things quiet for now, just in case, but…I have a doctor’s appointment this afternoon…we think I could be pregnant.” You whisper.

“Oh my god!” He gasps and then he quiets himself. “That’s amazing.” He whispers.

“I took the test yesterday, but the doctor will really be able to confirm it. I’ve been nauseous all morning, I guess this is just the beginning.”

“Well, whatever time off yeh need don’t be afraid to ask for it. I got your back.”

“Thanks.”

Around 3PM you leave to meet Harry at your doctor’s office. He dropped Buster off at home beforehand. Your name gets called and Harry gets up to go in with you. The nurse gives him a funny look.

“He, uh, I want him in there with me…” You tell the nurse, and she nods.

Harry had never been to the OBGYN with you before, why would he have needed to? He found it interesting that they made you pee the second you got there. He supposed it was the best way to tell if you’re pregnant or not.

“Alright, Y/N, what’s going on today?” The nurse asks.

“Well…I think I’m pregnant. I took a home test yesterday and it said so. And I’ve thrown up a few times in the last couple of days.”

“Any fever or anything like that?”

“Nope, just nauseous, really nauseous.”

“Alright.” The nurse makes a few notes and looks over your chart. “And this is your…?”

“Husband, Harry is my husband.” You smile at him. “We just got married in April.”

“Oh, congratulations!” She smiles. “Here, put this on, you know the drill. Dr. Johnson will be in with you shortly.”

The nurse steps out and leaves you to change into the hospital gown.

“Why would you need to put that on? Isn’t she just going to look at your stomach?”

“No, she’s going to examine me as well, make sure everything’s alright. It’s pretty standard.”

“Even for this kind of visit.”

“Yes.”

“Why are you putting it on backwards?”

“It’s easier for them when it’s open in the front. Harry…” You sigh. “I’ve been coming here for over ten years, I know what do.” You cling to the front of the gown and hop back up on the bed. There’s a knock on the door.

“Hi Y/N, oh!” She looks at Harry. “We have a visitor today.”

“Dr. Johnson, this is my husband, Harry.” The two shake hands.

“Very nice to meet you, I’ve heard a lot of good things over the years.” She looks at you. “Heard we’re feeling a bit nauseous today?”

“The last couple days, actually. As you know we’ve been trying to get pregnant basically since the end of April. I took a test yesterday and it came back positive.”

“I looked over your urine sample.” She beams. Harry stands up to hold your hand. “You’re pregnant, Y/N.”

You and Harry get teary eyed as you look at each other and smile.

“Congratulations.” She puts some gloves on. “You’re only about six weeks along. Now, Harry, I need to take a peek at your wife, and I’m sure you love looking, but-“

“I’ll sit down.” He says.

You lay back as she quickly examines you, making sure everything was fine. She examines your breasts next.

“You’re going to want to take these out if you plan to breastfeed. If you don’t then it doesn’t matter. Your belly piercing for sure you’ll want to remove though, and soon.” She covers your breasts back up. “No lumps or bumps, looking good.” She smiles and gets the ultrasound ready. You wave Harry back over to hold your hand. “This’ll feel cold at first, I’m sorry.” You jolt slightly from the cold jelly on the end of the ultrasound. She moves it around a bit. “Since you are six weeks, we may be able to hear the heartbeat today. There! See that tiny dot on the screen?” She points to it. “That’s your baby.”

“Harry, look.” You sniffle.

“I know.” He also sniffles. You both start to hear something. “Is that it? That’s the heartbeat?”

“Yes.” She smiles at the two of you. “I’ll send you home with the little clip, and we’ll print up some sonograms for you.”

She takes the ultrasound off and wipes your belly clean. She makes some notes on her laptop before sitting down to look at the two of you.

“Now, I know it took us some time for this to happen, so there are some precautions you’ll want to take. Y/N, you’re an active person. I want you to stick to walks and low weight exercises. Maybe even try some yoga to keep yourself relaxed. Is your job very stressful?”

“It can be…my biggest stress right now is that I might be changing jobs. I’ve been asked to apply for a teaching position at my old college.”

“That’s wonderful! Do you think all of that will be too much for you?”

“I’m not entirely sure. Something tells me I’ll get the job if I apply. It’s mostly the unknowns, like switching insurances and a new commute, stuff like that.” Dr. Johnson nods and looks at Harry. “And what do you do for work again? You’re a photographer?”

“Yeah, I own my own studio. We do really well.”

“Good, so you can be home for her when she needs it? Help out with things?”

“I already offered and she told me to calm down.” He chuckles.

“Y/N, I want you to let Harry help you. I know you like things a certain way, but let him pick up the slack alright? I wanna get you through this first trimester. I’m gonna give you a list of vitamins and nutrients you’ll need, okay?”

“Okay.”

“I want you to know though, if for any reason something happens, and…well…you miscarry, it’s not because you did anything wrong, okay? I’m sending positive vibes, but just be aware that those things happen.”

You shudder at the thought, but know she’s right.

“Maybe we should wait to tell our families and friends then…just until I’m farther along.” You say to Harry.

“Good idea. Although, didn’t you throw up at working this morning?”

“Okay, so Niall has an idea, but other than that let’s keep it quiet.”

“Okay.” He smiles and looks at the doctor. “Anything else?”

“Come see me again in three weeks. You can make an appointment on the way out. If anything feels weird though, come see me sooner.”

“Thanks, Dr. Johnson.” You smile as she exits the room.

You hop off the bed and get dressed. The woman at checkout hands you the sonogram prints and the copy of the video of the baby’s heart beating. She gives you an appointment card and out the door you go.

“So, should we head to the market and get you some pickles and sourcrout?” He jokes. He wipes a few tears from his glossy eyes.

“No.” You laugh. “I don’t have any cravings yet, but we should go to the store and get some of the vitamins on this list. I don’t have any of this stuff at home.”

“Alright.” He puts his hand on your thigh as he drives off. “I’m trying not to be too excited because I know things could…not go the way we plan, but-“

“I think it’s okay to be excited. We shouldn’t worry about something that could easily not happen. We just need to be careful.”

“Shit, I should’ve asked her if it was okay to have sex or not right now.”

“I’m sure it’s fine, Harry.”

“Six weeks ago, what was six weeks ago?” He furrows his brows. “That was definitely the night in your office, it had to have been.”

“What does it matter?” You laugh.

“I’d just like to know so when I’m old and grey and have to give some type of speech I can embarrass the kid and say they were conceived on mummy’s office floor.”

“Harry.” You pinch your nose. “If you ever-“

“Relax, I’m only kidding.”

“I don’t think you are.”

“Half kidding.” He grins.

//

After that, Harry started taking your picture every week. He’d have you stand in front of a blank wall with your shirt up in the same clothes so you could look back and see the progress.

“When you get to be farther along we should do a maternity shoot. I can set something nice up down here for you so you won’t have to climb the stairs.”

“That would be really nice.”

Before you’re able to roll your shirt down he comes over to you and kneels. He kisses on your lower stomach and hugs you before standing up.

“Was it sad taking all your piercings out?”

“A little…I can always have them put back in if I want later. I’m kind of glad I took the nipple ones, my boobs have been so tender.” You go into the kitchen to fill up your water bottle.

“My poor baby, I wish I could like absorb all your discomfort.” He pouts.

“I know, and I appreciate that.”

“What size is it this week?”

“Let’s consult the app. At twelve weeks, it’s the size of a passion fruit.” You smirk as you show him the picture.

“Oh wow! That’s kind of big.”

“Still just a fetus though, it’s not really a baby yet.”

“Can you believe the end of this week will be the end of your first trimester?”

“I’m so happy, I’m sick of throwing up all the time. I was talking with Eleanor and she said her second trimester was much better. I’m sorry I haven’t really been in the mood lately.” You wrap your arms around his waist.

“It’s okay, I understand.” He kisses your forehead. “Have you heard back from the school yet?”

“They said they’d be contacting me soon for a second interview.” You smile. “I’m really excited.”

“They know you’re pregnant?”

“Just Dr. Harrison. She said it’s not something I need to disclose yet.”

“I can’t believe Niall’s leaving Mark It soon too.”

“I know.” You frown. “I’m really going to miss him, but it’s what’s for the best. The startup that approached him is such a good opportunity for him, and he’ll be the director of their marketing department. It’s what he deserves. His last day is in two weeks.”

“That’s so wild, I remember when he started working there. He’s got like two years on you?”

“Mhm.”

“Harry, this really pretty girl started workin’ with me. She’s really funny too!” He says in Niall’s accent.

“Would you stop?” You laugh and nudge your husband. “It was platonic love at first sight.” You giggle.

Harry makes you both some dinner and you decide to eat on the sofa. You get a call from Seth.

“Hey, what’s up?”

“I asked Isaac to marry me, and he said yes!”

“What?!” You spit out the food in your mouth. “That’s amazing! How did you do it?!” You put the phone on speaker. “Hold on, I have you on speaker, Harry’s here too.”

“Okay, so I took him out for a walk to our favorite park near our place. You know the one.”

“I do.”

“And I just got down on one knee and asked him. He cried, I cried. It was really nice.”

“I’m so happy for the both of you!”

“Me too, mate, that’s amazing!” Harry exclaims.

“Harry?!” You both laugh when you hear Isaac’s voice.

“Congratulations!” You both say at the same time.

“Can I have the phone back, sorry, he’s very excited.” Seth laughs. “Rightfully so, I’m a great catch after all.”

“Remind me to vomit later.” You roll your eyes.

“Anyways, we’ve been talking about it for a while. We both wanna just do the courthouse thing, we don’t want a big ceremony, but we’ll definitely have a party to celebrate.”

“Wouldn’t be you if you didn’t have a party.”

“Exactly. We’re making the rounds calling everyone. We’ll keep you up to date on everything.”

“Sounds good! Congrats again!” You hang up the phone.

“Okay, Rachel and Mariah are next for sure.” Harry says.

“I’m so happy for them. Oh my goodness! Sarah and Niall set a date too, did he tell you?”

“What?! No! When?”

“Next fall! October 20th I think. He just told me today.”

“If he didn’t already know about the baby, I’d say let’s keep the news from him the longest.” He rolls his eyes.

“Speaking of that…why not invite our friends over soon for a little lunch so we can tell them the good news. I know we’re going to my mum’s this Sunday to tell her and my siblings. And then we’ll FaceTime your mum and Gemma. We need to call Nannie too.”

“I think havin’ the crew over is a great idea.” He kisses your temple and leans back into the couch.

//

Your mother cried when you told her you were pregnant. Your siblings were all really happy for you. It turns out Erica had also been keeping her pregnancy to herself and was 15-weeks along. It was a really nice day with family. You stopped off at your dad’s house as well, and he was thrilled to hear the news. When you got home you FaceTimed with Anne and Gemma. Anne was trying not to sob as she was absolutely overjoyed.

Your Nannie cried on the phone as well. She couldn’t believe two of her granddaughters were having babies at the same time. You were able to celebrate so many things with your friends when they came over. Niall’s last day at Mark It and his first day at his new job, Isaac and Seth’s recent engagement, and Rachel and Mariah officially passing in adoption forms with an agency.

“Okay, so I know you’re all here and it feels like we’re here for a ton of different reasons…” You start. “Harry, is the FaceTime set up?”

“Mhm, Lou and El are here.”

“Hi guys!” Louis exclaims from the phone.

“Great, well…” You turn to the side and rub your lower stomach.

Rachel and Sarah gasp and squeal and rush to you to hug you.

“Oh my goodness! How far along are you? You literally can’t tell.” Sarah says.

“Thirteen weeks, I’m officially in my second trimester.”

“That’s amazing!” Rachel wipes a few tears away. “I can’t believe it.” She hugs you again. “You’re gonna be such a great mom.”

“I can’t wait to be an auntie.” Sarah says. “For the both of you of course. Still keeping my fingers crossed for the two of you with this agency.”

“Thanks.” Mariah says. She gives Harry a hug and kiss. “Congrats, I’m so happy for the both of you.”

“Seriously, it’s amazing.” Seth says. He gives you a hug next. “This kid is gonna be so loved.”

“Do you think Buster will get jealous?” Isaac jokes.

“If he’s anything like his father, which we all know he is, then yes.” Niall says.

“Oi! I’m not that clingy.”

Everyone laughs including Louis and Eleanor from the phone. You were happy everyone was finally in the know. Your doctor’s appointments were going really well. Everything was good.

//

“Harry.” You whisper in the middle of the night. “Baby.” You nudge him and he groans. “Honey, please, I need you.” His eyes flutter open. He got slightly excited because he thought maybe your hormones were making you a little needy.

“What’s up?”

“Could you go to the corner store, the 24-hour one? I really need a slim-Jim.”

“Y/N, you don’t eat meat.”

“I know, but I really need a slim-Jim. I can’t get it out of my head. Please? I know it’s a lot to ask, but I can’t sleep.” You pout.

“Alright.” He yawns and sits up. “Anything else you need?”

“No, just a slim-Jim.” You smile. “You’re amazing, I love you.”

“I love you too.”

Harry slips out to head to the corner store. You sit up in anticipation. This was one of the first real cravings you had. You weren’t sure what it was, you just needed the disgusting, processed meat. He returns with it shortly and you devour it.

“Oh my god, thank you. That really hit the spot.”

“Probably shouldn’t eat those all the time. Maybe that vegan bacon we have could suffice.” He says as he climbs back into bed. “Sure that’s all yeh needed?”

“Yeah, why?”

“No reason.”

He was desperate for you. He loved the way your body was making slight changes. But he didn’t want you to feel pressured because he was the reason your body was changing.

The next day you had your second interview at the university. The faculty were really impressed with you. They told you a final decision would be made soon and you’d hear from them either way. You were extremely excited. Work had gotten boring without Niall. You two would text each other throughout the day, and you’d even FaceTime a couple times a week during lunch breaks.

As the days got shorter and colder, you found yourself feeling needy for cuddles. You either had Buster with you every second, or you had Harry’s arms around you. You still hadn’t quite gotten your sex drive back. You wanted to offer to blow him, but even that you, for the first time since you’ve known him, just couldn’t bring yourself to do. You felt terrible.

“I have to work late tonight, honey.” He says on the phone. “I’ve got an evening shoot for a family.”

“Okay…”

“I’ll grab myself something for dinner.”

“When do you think you’ll be home?”

“Maybe around nine? I’m not sure. I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay, I know you need to do what you need to do.”

You found yourself turning in earlier to bed as you noticed yourself getting more tired easily. You tried reading to tire your eyes out, but you felt something in the pit of your stomach that just wouldn’t go away. You look over and see the bare spot next to you and sigh. You wanted Harry. Oh shit, you really wanted Harry.

“Fuck.” You groan and get up.

You go into the closet and pull down your special box. You sigh when you grab your little bullet vibrator. You couldn’t even remember the last time you used it. You wiggle your pajama pants off and get back on the bed. You touch yourself with your hand first before turning the device on.

Harry was just coming in from his session, getting home a tad earlier than he expected. He even picked up a new jar of pickles to put in the fridge for you. As he walked down the hall to the bedroom he heard soft whimpers.

“What the…” He says to himself as he opens the door. His eyes nearly pop out of his head when he sees you.

“Harry!” You throw the vibrator somewhere else on the bed out of embarrassment.

“Sorry!” He nearly walks out of the room and then shakes his head at himself. “Wait a second, why am I leaving?” He asks himself more so than you. You reach for the bullet and turn it off. “So…has this been what you’ve been doing?” He sits on the edge of the bed. “Instead of with me?”

“What?! No! This is the first time I’ve even wanted to…and you weren’t home, and well…” Your cheeks were beat red. “I’m sorry, ugh, I’m so embarrassed.” You hide your face in your hands, but he pulls them away.

“You don’t need to be embarrassed, it’s okay. What made you want to use it?”

“I don’t know, I was missing you, and then I realized how much I was really missing you, and I just wanted you. And the damn thing wasn’t even doing it for me anyways.” You pout.

“Well, I’m here now.” He perks up. “You still in the mood?”

“Very much so. I’m sorry things have been so stagnant between us these last couple of months. I’ve just felt gross and nauseous and all of the above. I’ve wanted to do things for you, but-“

“It’s alright, I really understand. When El was pregnant with Eliza May, Louis sort of told me this might happen. I was prepared for it. I know it really doesn’t have much to do with me.”

“It really doesn’t, but I think I’m over that hump now. I love you so much, I hope you know that.”

“I do, and I love you too. You’re sacrificing a lot to grow this little one.” He gives your lower belly a little pat. He stands up and undresses down to his boxers, and gets your shirt off so you’re completely naked.

“I feel bad, you just got home. Did you eat and all that?”

“I did. Don’t worry, there’s really nothing else I’d rather be doing than lovin’ on my wife.”

He gets back on the bed and kisses you. It’s a slow kiss, sucking your bottom lip into his mouth, licking into your mouth. Doing all the things he knows you like. Even though you didn’t love all of the changes your body was making, Harry still, somehow, made you feel beautiful and sexy. He kisses down your chest, and plants nice wet kisses down your belly. His head gets between your legs and he gets to work.

You feel him groan against you as he licks into for the first time in ages.

“Got this wet thinkin’ of me?” He smirks and you push his head back down.

“Get over yourself, will you?” You laugh. “And yes, I did.” His tongue explores your folds before sucking on your clit. “Oh fuck, oh my god.” Your hands grip at his hair, and your legs start to shake. It didn’t take him long since you were already wound up. “Shit.” You breathe as he gets himself settled against the headboard.

“Come here, baby girl.”

You straddle his lap, and line yourself up with his hard dick, his boxers now long gone. You slowly sink down on him and moan out loudly when he bottoms out.

“Feel okay?” He grunts, desperately hoping he doesn’t come too soon.

“Feels amazing.” Your slot your mouth over his as you move up and down on him. You couldn’t get enough of him right now. All your senses were heightened.

“Y/N.” He moans as he thrusts up into you.

“Harry.” You moan back.

His hands grip your ass to help you move faster on him. You cling to his shoulders to give him full control of the pace. You both had the bed shaking as you took him so well.

“Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god.” You throw your head back as you release again, his come spurting up inside you at the same time. “Holy shit.” You press your forehead to his shoulder as he catches his breath. “I’m so sorry.” You kiss him. “How awful of me to make you wait like that.” You kiss him again. “Never again.” You kiss him a third time.

“Babe, babe! It’s okay.” He chuckles. “I’ve missed yeh like crazy, but don’t feel bad, alright?”

“You’re so amazing, I’m…I just love you.” You start tearing up. Another side effect of being pregnant. You cried all the time. He holds you close and rubs your back.

“I love you too.” He coos. “Come on, I bought you a fresh jar of pickles.”

“You did?!” You slide off of him and get your feet on the floor.

“Mhm.”

“Have I told you how much I love you?”

//

Things with you and Harry had gotten really got and heavy during your second trimester. You had even gotten to a point of sexting him at work. You just couldn’t help it. You had never wanted him so badly before. And he was always right there, ready to give it to you. You both would often only wear underwear around your apartment to have easier access.

Just as you were getting home one night, you got the call you had been waiting for.

“Dr. Harrison, great hear from you!” You get upstairs and into your living room.

“Hi, Y/N! How have you been feeling?”

“Much better, thanks. The nausea has definitely stopped.”

“Glad to hear it. The search committee has made a decision.” You take a deep breath, knowing this phone call could go one of two ways. “And we’d like to offer you the position.”

“Oh my god! Are you serious?! That’s amazing!”

“I’m glad to hear you’re excited.” She chuckles.

“I’ll just need to chat things over with my husband. I know he’ll be just as excited.”

“Great! Do you think we could schedule a meeting for Friday? There are a lot of things we’ll need to go over, especially with HR since you may not end up teaching in the fall. Luckily, you’ll have the entire winter break to prep up for the courses we’ll need you for this spring.”

“Yeah! Uh, what time Friday? I could probably leave work around three, and get to campus for like 3:30 if that works for you.”

“I’m open!”

“Wonderful, thank you so much. I’m very excited.”

You hang up the phone and squeal. Just as you’re celebrating with yourself, Harry walks in with Buster. He rushes over to you excitedly. You run over to Harry and give him a big hug and kiss.

“Guess who just got offered the job of being a junior faculty member?!”

“Shut up, are you serious?!”

“I am! I have a meeting with Dr. Harrison Friday to go over a ton of things. And I’ll have the entire winter break to prep up for the classes I’ll be teaching. I’ll be able to negotiate my salary too, they know what I’m expecting, and I won’t take anything less. We have a baby on the way after all.” You rub your hands over your lower belly where the cutest bump was finally starting to form.

“I’m so fucking happy for you. This is amazing! We should celebrate.”

“We can this weekend. Let me get everything finalized first. But…I know another way we can celebrate right now.” You wrap your arms around his neck.

“I really like this whole thing of you not gettin’ your period for nine months. It’s nice to just do it whenever.” He kisses you.

“I was looking up some safe positions we can try too.”

“Oh really?”

“Mhm.” You wink at him and you both shuffle down to the bedroom.

You were amazed at Harry’s stamina. He was never too tired to fuck you when you asked. Sometimes you wouldn’t even need to ask, he could just tell you wanted it sometimes, like he could smell it on you. He truthfully couldn’t get enough of you, and he was happy that you seemed to be back in the groove of feeling the same way.

He loved going to work with fresh scratch marks or love bites. He’d love when you’d send him a risky text in the middle of the day. The second trimester was treating him very well.

[pauliah]

Pregnant During The Pandemic/Paulia’s Pandemic Pregnancy

Late period. While driving to get pizza in Irmo, I told my husband I had to grab some items from the Dollar Tree. He kept asking what you have to get, and I replied, “a few things.” Clearly, he doesn’t get discretion, lol. So, I went in and bought three pregnancy tests and came back out. We went back home, and I took all three and showed him. Since the tests were so inexpensive, he was hesitant to get his hopes up again. The next day I was visiting my best friend. I often would ride with her to drop the girls off at daycare because of the pandemic. I would work from home and would like a little company. Before arriving at her house, I visited Wal-Mart and purchased a Clear Blue test. We dropped the girls off, and stopped at Waffle House, and ate in. I casually slipped off the restroom, took the test, and boom, it read, [PREGNANT]! In my mind, I was like, do I tell her?? I needed to tell someone, so I showed her the results. She cried. Me, I was still in shock. I texted my husband with the results, and then he said, “I believed you yesterday.” Again, we decided only to tell my best friend, my mom, his mom, and his aunt until I made it through the first trimester. November 4, 2021, we confirmed I was pregnant for the second time.

Now once you have a miscarriage, you are constantly paranoid. I saw a sign that reminded me of my last miscarriage and drove myself to the ER. The wait for so long, I went home and came back the following day. All the hospitals in the area were filled with Covid-19 patients. Luckily, I was seen that Sunday and found out everything was fine. However, the Doctor suggested I see my OBGYN to follow up. Now mind, you, I tried to get an earlier appointment with my OBGYN earlier, but they had no appointments. But they had appointments now *side eye*. So, that Tuesday, I had a check-up with a Nurse Practitioner, who told me now we wait and see. That was not comforting in the least.  In the midst of all of this, we were about to close on a house. As we were packing, my family was eyeing me, wondering why I wasn’t moving anything heavy. That Thursday, we closed, moved, and said Goodbye to Briargate Condominiums after seven years. We had a home for Grayson to grow up in, and we were happy!

[carterbabyjourney]

Special delivery!

Last Day of Birth Control ! 🙌🏿

Tomorrow is our first ultrasound and blood work appointment since our first cycle was cancelled due to all the complications and hospitalizations. Now that I am still on a healthy track we are onward to prepare my body for our embryo transfer on August 21st.

I will be taking Estrace, Pre-Natal vitamins and Progesterone in Oil (PIO) to prepare my body for pregnancy.

Estrace I will take 3 times a day by mouth until my doctor tells me to discontinue. Estrace helps placenta function, boost blood flow to my uterus and primes my body for breastfeeding. It also assists with with thickening my uterine lining so when the embryo is implanted it has a better chance of sticking. We need my uterine lining to be over 11mm thick in order for a embryo to attach. So the monitoring that will begin tomorrow will be checking for my hormone levels and my lining to make sure it’s progressing and ready for transfer day. Monitoring will be every other day up until the transfer week and then it will be everyday until transfer day.

Progesterone in Oil. Progesterone hormone is a type of female hormone that females naturally produce. Well I don’t produce enough and that’s because of my PCOS therefore I have to take PIO shots in my (butt muscle) for 10 weeks even after I find out I’m pregnant. The PIO helps with the uterine lining as well and prepares my body to support the embryo, so the embryo will successfully implant and continue to grow. Because I don’t produce this on my own is why I must continue it for so long so that it can provide the nutrients the baby would be until the placenta can take over. This usually happens in the second trimester. Therefore, my first trimester will be monitored closely.

The needle and medication (PIO) is painful because it’s injected into my butt muscle closer to and near the rope of my back and the needle is longer. The actual medication is in fact oil so it’s thicker which makes the injection more uncomfortable. I had one so far before my last cycle was cancelled so I know the pain. Suggestions are to numb the area first with ice to alleviate discomfort AO we will try that.

We have no worries that the first round won’t work or that we will have any issues during the. Entirety of our pregnancy. We are claiming a healthy baby. But we will keep everyone updated up until the transfer day. We have decided we will wait a while before letting everyone know what the results are until we graduate to our OBGYN and are no longer with the fertility doctor. After our transfer we will find out two weeks later and won’t graduate to our OBGYN until I am 8-10 weeks.

I have been stress free, relaxed and focused on finishing out this year; pregnancy and graduation . 2019 will be another great year and we are ready for what’s to come. Thanks again for everyone reading , texting, calling and visiting. Lunch dates and dinner is also appreciated. We have been enjoying each others company and thankful for those we have around us.

Updates soon.

7/31/2018

Baby Carter is coming 👶🏾🔜🍍💕 Mrs. Carter

[thorne93]

What Are We Gonna Do? (Part 7)

Prompt: Imagine that you’re Spencer Reid’s wife, and you get the news of his arrest in Mexico. But you’ve been keeping something from him and the team. How will it affect Spencer?

Word Count: 2329

Warnings: Language, violence, anger, drama, angst

Notes: This picks up right at the beginning of Season 12, episode 13. Spoilers from here till then. Thanks to my beta @like-a-bag-of-potatoes​

Tags: @ultrarebelheart​ @cocosierra94 @marvel-imagines-yes-please @demongodess

~~~~~~~~

The following morning, everyone was gathered around Spence’s desk, talking about him and the situation. You had walked in and no one seemed to notice it.

“Do you think Reid should’ve taken the plea deal?” Luke asked.

 “Absolutely not,” JJ emphatically responded.

 “Now that it’s off the table he's looking at 25 years to life,” Tara said.

“So, you think he should've?” JJ accused.

 “No. I’m just saying 25 years is a long time,” Tara said.

 “You’re telling me,” you interrupted.

 Everyone spun to face you with guilty looks.

 “Hey, how’re you doing?” JJ asked when she hugged you.

 “Not good. I can’t sleep or eat. I also have something I need to tell you all.”

 Every pair of eyes narrowed on you with a furrowed brow as you stood there, feeling exposed. Garcia just entered and you decided you would tell Rossi in a little bit.

 “Uh, there’s a reason I’ve been so emotional about all of this. I’m sure my behavior has been less than ideal, I understand that, but the thing is….I don’t want to raise a baby on my own,” you said as you breathed out and closed your eyes while Garcia patted your back.

 “Baby? Y/N, you’re pregnant?” JJ almost cheered. “Congratulations!”

 You shook your head. “This should be good news, right? But I can’t help but think that this is a tragedy. Spence won’t get to see the first trimester due to just being in jail waiting for trial. He won't get to see the first ultrasound --” You couldn’t talk any more as you started to cry and everyone came forward and hugged you.

 “Does Spencer know?” Tara asked.

 You nodded. You swallowed the lump in your throat. “Yeah, he found out when he got the first plea deal. I was waiting to tell him when he got home but….and I wanted to see if this would get dropped, but when he was charged and Fiona started talking about plea bargains, I knew he had to know just what he was dealing with here on the outside.”

 “We’re going to do everything humanly possible to get Reid out to see his baby. Right, guys?” Garcia vowed.

 “Absolutely,” Walker said.

 “Thank you all, so much. I didn’t want to announce this seeing as it’s not exactly a great time but…”

 “So what are you going to do about work? It can’t be easy working, thinking of cases, Reid, and the baby,” JJ said.

 “I’m not going into the field. I’ll be here with Garcia and doing paperwork mainly, so office stuff and if and when I need to leave, I can.”

 “So what are we gonna do?” Luke asked.

 “I’ve got that covered,” Garcia answered. “We’re going to send him letters every day, we’re gonna put money in his commissary account, we’re going to give Y/N and the little one tons of healthy food, snacks, and surveillance. If we aren’t with Reid, we’re helpin Y/N. She’ll need meals, help with Diana and the house. For Reid, we are going to send him puzzles, magazines, books, whatever we can think of to make sure those gorgeous gears inside that boy wonder brain are lubed up and in perfect working order to keep us on track. I took the liberty of making a chart.”

 “Oh, that’s so pretty,” JJ said.

 “You must’ve done that while I was asleep,” you noted with a small laugh.

 “What else can we do for you, Y/N?” JJ asked.

 You shrugged. “I don’t know. I’ve never been pregnant. I guess I need a doctor, but I don’t want to make the first trip without Spencer…”

 “We could take you, and record it and show it to him?” she offered.

 You shrugged. You really wanted Spence to actually be there, but if he wasn’t even going to trial in three months, you’d be well into your second trimester by then.

 “Let me get you set up with my doctor and we’ll go,” JJ said. You nodded, starting to become numb.

 Rossi and Emily came out and started talking about Garcia’s chart, thankfully. You weren’t sure you could stand any more attention or any more talk of babies.

 “You need a new mailing address,” Rossi said.

 “What’s going on?” Walker questioned.

 “Reid was moved from the police precinct to the Millburn Correctional facility.”

 “Oh, God,” you gasped as more tears broke free. Luke and Walker helped you into the office chair.

 Prison. He was in prison. Not jail. No. Full blown, shanking, gangs, violence, prison. You were weeping so hard you put your head down on the desk.

 ��Is she gonna be alright?” Rossi asked.

 “Y/N here is gonna have Spence’s first baby,” JJ informed Rossi and you pulled your head back up.

 “Oh, no, kid,” he sighed as he shook his head.

 --------------------

 Two days later, you went to see Spence for the first time since he’d been sent to prison. They finally opened visitation. It had been hell for you. You were terrified of what he was going through and his mom was getting worse. She was fighting you and Cassie.

 You saw him come out to the visitation room and your heart floated, then sank like the Titanic. Seeing him felt like air, but toxic air. How could you absolutely love the sight of someone but hate it at the same time? Of course you loved seeing him, but seeing him in prison clothing, it made your blood cold.

 He came up to you and you stood to hug and the guard shouted, “No Touching!” You wanted to go up and punch him in the fucking face and ask him how he liked that for touching, but you swallowed your anger.

 “It’s so good to see you,” you said with a smile. You would do your best not to cry around Spence, because he didn’t need anything else clouding his mind right now.

 “I know. I’ve missed you so much. How’s everything at home? How’s the little one?” he asked with a sparkle in his eye as he glanced down to your stomach.

 You sighed a little. “Your mom is having some trouble. The little one is fine. I--uh--I’m actually going to the OBGYN with JJ and Garcia soon for my first appointment.” Your lower lip quivered and you bit down hard to stop your emotions.

 “Oh, well...that...that’ll be good,” he answered.You knew this was killing him just as much as it was killing you.

 “We’re going to record the whole thing so you can hear everything the doctor says,” you promised, happiness in your tone.

 “Oh, good,” he said and his mood darkened.

 “Are you okay? How are you doing?”

 “I’m okay,” he answered with a choke.

 “Are you sure? I...I know this can’t be easy, but you can’t shut me out, okay? We have a child on the way and we can’t fall apart now. You and I both have to keep strong, alright?”

 “I know, I know.”

 Some lewd comments were starting to be murmured about you and you noticeably saw Spencer’s demeanor change. He went from broken and sad, to stiff and on edge.

 “Don’t pay them any attention,” you said.

 “But you’re my wife, and you’re carrying my child. How am I not supposed to react?” he asked.

 “By not reacting,” you answered sternly. “While you are in here, Spencer Reid, you will do everything you can to keep your head down and out of trouble, am I making myself clear?” you demanded. You never spoke to Spence this way but he was already in a dangerous situation and his protectiveness over you didn’t need to get him hurt or worse.

 “Yes..I just don’t want them looking at you, I’m sorry.”

 You shrugged. “Sweetheart, it’s a small price to pay to see your handsome face.” You grinned at him, a tender moment occurring between you. The moment started to fizzle as you both came back down to reality though. “I--uh--I need to tell you something else.”

 “Okay, what is it?” he asked with concern as his brows knitted.

 How were you going to tell him this? Hell, you got sick yourself when you heard it. Relaying it to him now was harder than you thought.

 “Everyone thought it would be best if you heard it from me. We got the tox panel back...Scopolamine came back negative,” you said softly, avoiding his eyes.

 “What? That’s what we were using to prove Scratch did this! How are we going to do that now? He’s going to win,” he said with angering defeat.

 “No,” you countered in a defiant tone. “He will not win. He is not smarter than all of us. Okay?”

 “He’s going to get away with this, Y/N, can’t you see that?”

 “No, all I can see is my husband giving up too god damn quickly. You have got to hold onto hope for me? Please?” you begged. “I can’t do all of this alone. I can’t fight Scratch and figure out how to raise a baby and work with the team. I can’t do it all, okay? I need your help too.”

 You stared at him a second, trying to get your message through. He nodded while swallowing. You knew this was tough on him too, but you couldn’t let him give up.

 “You’re right, I’m sorry. I’m just so angry because I’m in here and I can’t do anything and I know you’re handling everything. How did I deserve someone like you?” he asked.

 “You were you. Your amazing, cute, handsome self. That’s how.”

 “Visiting hours are over,” the guard announced and your heart dropped. “Inmates line up.”

 You wanted nothing more than to hug him, kiss him, tell him it would all be okay but you couldn’t. You weren’t allowed, and that killed you. You blew him a kiss.

 “I love you,” you said as he stood up.

 “I love you too,” he said quietly. You stayed until you could no longer see him and you stood and walked out of the prison, you got to your car and started to break down. You were slowly learning how to keep your tears in, so that when you were alone you could break down. Otherwise, your friends and family would think you were some hysterical woman who couldn’t keep it together.

 You decided to go home for lunch to check on Diana.

 “Hey, Diana,” you greeted as you came in the door and dropped your things off.

 “Oh, Y/N, I’m so glad you’re here. Tell that girl to leave!” she instructed as she pointed at Cassie.

 “Why? What’s wrong?” you asked gently.

 “She’s stealing our things and she’s saying I need medicine. Hah, not likely!”

 You closed your eyes and took a deep breath. You loved your mother-in-law, of course you did, but right now, you did not need one of her episodes. Not now. Not today.

 “Diana, please, this is Cassie. She’s your live-in nurse. She takes care of you while Spencer is away for work and vacation?”

 “Why aren’t you with him?” she asked, her eyes narrowing.

 “Uh, not enough vacation time. Spencer has several years on me and hardly ever took vacation so…” You shrugged and held your arms out then hit them against your legs.

 “Well I don’t want this girl looking after me.”

 “Alright, Diana, why don’t you sit on the couch while I get you some nice hot tea, and I’ll have a talk with her.”

 “You need to check her bag,” Diana insisted. You turned to Cassie and gestured that she leave the room while you get her tea. You crushed one of her pills and put it in her tea. You felt awful for lying to her but you had to get one of them down her or you wouldn’t have a peaceful night.

 You gave her the cup then stepped into the master room and closed the door.

 “Cassie, I’m so sorry. I know she can be trying. I hate to ask, but do you mind if I check your bag?”

 The brunette nurse looked shocked at first but then handed you her bag.

 “Thank you. I just...precaution, you know?” You looked through the bag and found nothing. “Just as I suspected. Is she suspicious of everything?” you asked as you sat on the bed.

 Cassie shrugged slightly. “She has good days and bad. Sometimes she’s completely aware, others she thinks I’ve broken in and come to hurt her.”

 You sighed. “Okay. Just...try to get her to take her medicine. I put some in the tea so, that’ll cover us until around 9.”

 “How was Dr. Reid?”

 “He uh...He is okay,” you answered.

 “And the little bean?” she asked. You had ended up telling Cassie and Diana because they needed to know the vital information but you didn’t go into extensive detail about why Spence was being wrongly held in prison.

 “I’m not sure. I can’t even be excited about it. I just keep thinking of Spence.”

 She came over and hugged your shoulders.

 “It’ll all work out. Your team is amazing. You’ll figure this out.”

 “Thank you, Cassie. I’m going to make some lunch then I’m heading back into the office. Is that alright?”

 “Yeah, we just finished lunch ourselves.”

 You made a sandwich and grabbed some potato chips and watched a random sitcom, finding none of the material funny. When you were done, you headed back into the office and worked on paperwork. The team was away for a case. You let yourself get lost in paper work, thankful for the distraction, and cleaning up your desk as well as Spencer’s. Before you knew it, it was 6:30 and everyone was filing into the office.

 “Hey, how’d it go?” JJ asked as she came up.

 “Okay,” you said meekly with a shrug.

 Everyone nodded, knowing there’s not much more to say in that situation.

[erinandcaitlin]

My Pregnancy Through Week 20

With 9 weeks to go before my due date, I’m realizing I have written pretty much nothing about my pregnancy; I also have a fairly limited set of photos from this time other than the profile photos we have taken every 4 weeks. In 9 weeks we’ll be entering a period of sleeplessness and intensity that will probably be the start of a long period of time where the idea of sitting and writing something down will seem like a luxury. So I figured now is a good time to try and jot down some thoughts and memories about this time.

My second pregnancy has been very different than my first was (or would have been). I entered my first pregnancy with a sense of cautious optimism, with Erin and I not really talking in definites and saying things like hoping it would “stick.” We knew that the odds were 1 in 4 that something could go wrong and the embryo would stop developing; but we tried to also keep in mind the other half of those odds, the 3 in 4 of success. Unfortunately the cautiousness did not do anything to prevent how devastating it was to lose the pregnancy after only 8 weeks. On paper it was a short period of time, and it happened during the most likely time for it to happen. But after a year of trying, after finally seeing the positive test, it was hard not to immediately allow myself to really imagine our lives with a baby in 9 months, and think about a nursery, and get excited about watching the oval with the tiny heartbeat on the ultrasound screen grow. The intensity of the grief over losing something I had so briefly was unexpected.

I still think about that first pregnancy and what might have been, whether it was a girl or a boy. I don’t really want this to turn into an essay about processing my miscarriage right now, but it’s important context for how this pregnancy has felt for me so far.

It took another year, lots of doctor’s appointments, tests, and finally one round of half-dose fertility medication before we got another set of positive tests. I didn’t start crying like I did with the first positive pregnancy test a little over a year prior - I think I was holding things farther away from myself, thinking that maybe if I did that I wouldn’t jinx things, or if something did go wrong again I could do a better job of shielding myself from it. I don’t mean to make it sound like I wasn’t happy - I had counted down the days until I could take that test, and I woke up early (which is a big deal, as anyone who knows me would agree) so I could take it right away. I was incredibly happy when I saw the positive test, but I think there was also a thread of fear running underneath it.

While Erin was still asleep, I tried to think fast about how I could tell him in a way that would make for a cute story later. With the first pregnancy I was so excited I just went with the first thing I thought of, which was calling down to him while he was on his computer, “Hey Erin, can you clean the litter box? I won’t be able to for the next 9 months.” Which, in retrospect, was… not cute. I ended up grabbing a little jewelry box and putting in a pair of the booties Betsy had sent us during our last pregnancy - two little knitted socks with pom poms on top - and the two positive tests. I waited impatiently in the bathroom for Erin to wake up for his morning shower. After what seemed like approximately four hours and was probably more like 10 minutes, he finally shuffled into the bathroom and I shoved the box in his hands.

He was clearly not awake yet and mumbled, “What is this?”

“Open it!”

He looked at me with confusion before he slowly opened the box and squinted down at the contents. “Why are you giving me cotton balls?”

He kept staring down at the box in his hands for a few more seconds before he (finally) noticed the pregnancy tests and looked up at me, totally awake.

“Really?!”

---

My first appointment for an ultrasound was at 8 weeks. For the 4 weeks leading up to it, I’m not really sure how to describe where our heads were at. The last time we went in for an 8 week appointment, there was a small oval that didn’t pulse like it did last time, and the silence of ultrasound tech. So we were both hesitant to dive back into being too excited. We were quiet on the drive to the new OBGYN’s office, and on the way in Erin asked me how I was feeling.

“I don’t know. I just have an intense feeling of dread.” Erin squeezed my hand and we went inside to wait for our appointment. When we were called back into the exam room, the nurse was excitedly asking us how far along we were, talking about the classes they offered at the hospital, how great our doctor was, but honestly I can barely remember any of it. I talked to Erin about it later and it turns out we were both thinking: “This only matters if there’s actually a heartbeat.”

Our doctor came in and was upbeat and friendly with us - and I think she immediately could tell how tense we were. “Let’s just get to the ultrasound, sound good?”

Erin and I held hands as she pulled up the ultrasound machine. When the picture came up clearly showing our baby with a beating heart, I instantly burst into tears. I had no idea that was going to happen - I had convinced myself so strongly that the results were going to be bad that the shock of seeing everything was fine just totally overwhelmed me.

“Everything looks great, guys,” she said. I can’t really convey how well she handled this - she wasn’t overly saccharine or dismissive or over-enthusiastic, just really confidently encouraging like, “I knew it! I knew it would be fine.”

Above: 8 week ultrasound photo

I won’t say that from that point on I didn’t have any anxiety anymore. Appointments were 4 weeks apart, and it felt like the cycle basically went:

Have appointment where everything is fine

Feel reassured and happy for 2-3 days

Increasingly worry over the ensuing 3 weeks

Repeat

I actually ended up buying a mini doppler, which I honestly think is what kept me sane in the beginning phase when I couldn’t feel the baby moving yet. I set some rules and expectations for myself - only once a week, I ran a timer to make sure I never did it for more than 10 minutes, and I reminded myself that if I couldn’t find a heartbeat, it didn’t mean something was wrong; an embryo is tiny, and I’m not a doctor. Luckily it was never really an issue - there was only once or twice when I couldn’t find it on the first go, and usually taking a break and having a snack was all it took for me to find it on the next try.

The other thing that weirdly helped during the first trimester was the fact that I was having all kinds of fun symptoms that I didn’t have the first time. I had just started a new job when the “morning” sickness started. As you may know or have heard, “morning” sickness is a misnomer. For me it was all day sickness. I was trying to orient myself into a new position at a new company, and was sitting on conference calls feeling like I needed to barf all day. I was hungry but didn’t want to eat anything. I chugged mint tea and ginger tea, and demolished containers of “Preggie Pops” trying to keep myself above water. Short drives around town would make me carsick.

The other fun symptom I had was that my skin went completely nuts. I have never in my life had acne that bad, and that includes middle school and high school. Again, it was in some ways a reassuring sign that my pregnancy was progressing well, but it wasn’t pretty. Add to that that suddenly every ingredient in every makeup item I used was “maybe not safe for pregnancy, I don’t know, but probably don’t use it just in case.”

Anyway, at this point we decided to tell our immediate family. Betsy and Steve happened to be visiting around this time, so when we went out to dinner to the fancy Black Cat Bistro, we told them then. There was going to be no explaining around all the special requests I was going to have to make for the meal! For my mom and dad, and Matt and Mallory, we used FaceTime. Everyone was super excited for us, as they’d all known how long we’d been trying for our second pregnancy and how much we’d been hoping for it.

Sometime around 9 or 10 weeks I had to go on a business trip to NYC, which meant a 6 hour cross-country flight. Hoo boy was that fun. I did okay for the first hour or two, but things abruptly went downhill for no discernible reason, and I spent the last 4 hours listening to Netflix shows with my eyes closed and putting all my mental energy towards not throwing up. While in New York I started running out of Preggie Pops and we wandered through drug stores until I found a bag of LemonHeads, which really did not work nearly as well and I now suspect actually made things worse. We went to some really nice restaurants while we were in town, and when my stomach was feeling agreeable I got to thoroughly enjoy them, but there were nights where I only got to eat a couple bites of really good food before my stomach arbitrarily said, “Nope, we’re done here. We’re hungry but literally everything looks disgusting. No more fish for you.” The flight back wasn’t as bad as the flight there had been, maybe just because I was so looking forward to being at home again.

Looming on the horizon was also our trip that we had been planning for almost a year to our friends’ destination wedding. I briefly considered canceling the trip, mainly out of fear that I’d somehow disrupt the pregnancy, but decided ultimately to go for it. The trip was for one week in France and one week in Iceland, and I mostly did okay on the flight. I had learned at this point that making sure my stomach wasn’t empty helped, so I brought literally an entire plastic shopping bag of snack food on the flight with me - enough food that we got pulled aside at security so they could look through it. There were a few other downsides to traveling at this point - I was in France and couldn’t eat most of the cheeses, or any of the charcuterie meats. (To be fair, I settled instead for stuffing my face with bread and pastries.) I couldn’t drink any wines, or the fancy coffees, and when we went to nice restaurants I had to get my meat well done. My bathing suits didn’t really fit anymore and a lot of my clothes in general were starting to get uncomfortably tight. I got tired really easily, and my appetite was still a bit finicky at this point. But in spite of all that, the trip was amazing, and I’m so glad we didn’t cancel it. I get to look back at the photos and think, “I carried my baby all around France and Iceland before he was even born.”

This could easily turn into a whole other post about our trip, so I’m going to skip ahead so this doesn’t end up being 50 pages instead of 15!

Right after we got back from our trip, we had our 12 week appointment where we got to see the baby being active for the first time. This was when we decided on the nickname, “Rupert (or Roberta) Roll-Around.” I had originally used that name in reference to Erin’s tendency to roll himself up in the blankets in the night; now it seemed perfect for baby that couldn’t seem to keep still.

Above: 12 week ultrasound

It was also around the time when I could opt to do blood testing for genetic/health screenings, and find out the gender of the baby. We both agreed we wanted to know, and I went in for the blood draw on a weekday morning. I underestimated how much blood they were going to need to take, and definitely did not eat enough beforehand - for the first time ever (and I have had a lot of blood draws in my life, and have donated blood multiple times) I briefly passed out after the draw. Some exacerbating factors were that I’m pretty sure I got a new phlebotomist (which was a word I didn’t realize I knew until I said it to Erin - a health tech who does blood draws) - I had been many times and never seen her there - and her needle insertion was quite painful compared to others I’ve had, not to mention she kept wiggling it around in my arm. The final straw was when she remove the needle and dropped the cotton ball, so I got an eyeful of a bunch of blood before the room started receding and I muttered, “Uh, I’m getting kind of dizzy” before I went out for a moment or two. I woke up quickly and got to experience the fun process of having my chair leaned back, suddenly feeling like it was a million degrees and sweating, having ice packs arranged around my neck and arms, and being handed a series of apple juice boxes to chug. The apple juice more than anything else helped make the room stabilize and come back into focus. Once I felt stable enough I went and sat in the waiting room with more juice and a bunch of crackers until I was okay enough to go back to work.

Long story short, a week later we got the results back - no abnormalities on the genetic screenings, woo! The nurse offered to tell me the gender over the phone, as well as the option for her to leave a card at the front desk with the gender so Erin and I could find out together. We opted for the card and went in first thing the next morning. We made it as far as the parking lot before we stopped to open the envelope.

Erin asked if we should guess first.

“Sure,” I said. “What do you think it’ll be?”

“Hmm… I think… we are having a girl. A Roberta Roll-Around.”

“I think it’s a Rupert. Ready?”

We stood behind the car and opened the card together. A boy! A tiny Erin! We honestly would have been equally excited either way; more than anything the best feeling was having one more thing that made everything about the baby feel so much more real.

We waited to tell our extended family about the pregnancy until 16 weeks, a number I had somewhat arbitrarily picked. Another piece of context to add here is that following my first miscarriage, I had joined a few online communities for women who were trying to conceive after a miscarriage. It was incredibly helpful to have commiseration from people who were also struggling with a mix of hopefulness, sadness, and fear; but it also exposed me to a lot of stories of women with repeat miscarriages, mostly losing them before 16 weeks. The number stuck in my head, so that’s where 16 weeks came from.

The 16 week ultrasound was especially awesome - the baby was putting on a real show, moving his arms and legs around and flipping over. The doctor was extremely positive about how he was developing - his brain, spine, and organs all looked perfect. We got a bit of it on video, which I am still trying to get uploaded here... watch this space!

Above: Me at 12 weeks and 16 weeks

Above: 16 week ultrasound photo

The next big milestone was the 20 week anatomy scan. Another opportunity to be excited and nervous at the same time. We were excited at the opportunity to see our baby moving on the screen for an hour or more - leading up to this we had had ultrasounds at most of our appointments, but they were usually quite quick - think less than 5 minutes. Watching the embryo grow from a jelly bean at 8 weeks to a tiny baby-shaped jelly bean at 12 weeks and then a wow-that’s-a-real-baby and woah-he-flipped-over baby at 16 weeks had been amazing, but it always felt like we got 2 seconds to absorb it before the machine was turned off and we had another 4 week wait ahead of us. So the idea of a luxurious hour spent watching the baby was extremely exciting. But obviously the anatomy scan is also a potential time to find out whether there might be something wrong.

In the end the scan went really well, and we got to watch the baby frustrate the ultrasound tech by wiggling and moving around constantly. I couldn’t feel him moving quite yet, so in spite of the fact that it was making the ultrasound tech’s job a bit more difficult, seeing him roll and kick was awesome. The doctor came in afterwards to let us know that everything looked good, the only thing they had noticed was that the vermis, a connective piece between the two halves of the cerebellum, did not seem to go as far down as they’d expect. The cerebellum itself was exactly the right size, which was good news. She said we should go for a fetal MRI, and then depending on those results come back for a follow-up scan.

This was definitely not the result we were hoping for, but we immediately went about doing some reading to learn as much as we could. Everything we found was all around reassuring - the fact that the cerebellum was the right size ruled out the most severe options, and the fact that it was only partially vs. entirely missing made it even less concerning. It seemed the worst potential effects based on these combined factors was that early on in baby/toddlerhood, he may have slightly worse fine motor skill control - but studies showed that by age 6 kids with this abnormality were entirely caught up with their peers. This particular issue also has an extremely high false positive rate - over 30% - and it was generally recognized to be a fairly new thing to catch, mostly due to how rapidly the tech was improving. In other words, doctors may have been over-diagnosing or over-concerned just because they could see it in a way they couldn’t 5 years ago. All these factors combined reassured us so we were able to control the extent of our worrying/distress. To jump right to the end, the MRI techs said everything looked totally normal to them (and they also mentioned that the baby did not seem to want to sit still long enough for them to get more than a couple of photos), the doctor had us come in for another scan anyway, and came out of that still not entirely sure the extent of things. We declined doing another MRI, especially because the last one had been fine; and it also wasn’t going to make any difference in our plans, since there’s nothing to be “done” about it, so we wanted to just move on from it. It honestly hasn’t even crossed my mind since then, at least until I wrote it down just now :)

Phew! So that makes 20 weeks (plus a brief 8 week fast-forward to the second scan), which is a good halfway mark. I’ll stop this entry here and start up the next one this week - from 20 weeks to where I am now, at 32 weeks.

[believingispowerfulmagic]

“The Nanny” Chapter 24: Leopold

Warning: Discussion of Regina’s rape and how it made her feel.

Regina had been at the hospital more times than she ever wanted in just one week. Most of those times had been to see Dr. Espenson and once was Henry’s checkup. Now, though, she was sitting in the office of her OBGYN, waiting for her own checkup. Robin sat beside her, holding her hand while checking his email with his other one.

“Regina?” a nurse called from the door. She smiled at the couple. “You can follow me to the examination room.”

Standing, Regina took Robin’s hand and followed the nurse, who handed Regina an examination gown. “According to this, you’re here for your first semester screening, is that correct?” she asked Regina.

“Yes,” she replied, sitting on the examination table. “Dr. Ludgate also mentioned something about being able to hear the baby’s heartbeat as well.”

The nurse nodded. “An ultrasound is usually part of the screening. But first she’s going to check your vitals as well as measure your abdomen.”

           Regina smoothed down the loose t-shirt she wore. She had been so caught up with her legal woes, she hadn’t noticed how much weight she had started to gain until she had been standing in the middle of her old room in tears with all her clothes surrounding her. Robin had found her and had cupped her small bump, gently chiding their baby for making things difficult for her. She had chuckled, batting him away before finding a decent outfit that fit.

           The nurse handed her an examination gown. “You’ll need to change into this. Dr. Ludgate will be in shortly.”

           “Do you need me to step out?” Robin asked once the nurse had left.

           Regina chuckled as she headed for a curtained off area. “It’s nothing you haven’t already seen, Robin. I’m fine having you in the room.”  

           “Well, let me know if you need any help,” he replied and she glimpsed him settling back against the chair.

           Once she was in the flimsy examination gown, she hopped back onto the table. She rubbed her bump. “I feel like I’m neglecting Bean,” she whispered.

           “Nonsense,” Robin told her. “You’re doing everything you’re supposed to—eating healthy, avoiding everything they advise you to avoid, taking your prenatal vitamins, keeping your appointments and the list goes on.”

           She nodded. “I know. But I feel like I should’ve noticed that I was gaining weight or that I was starting to show sooner. I feel like I’m more preoccupied with myself than with Bean.”

           “I think it’s a bit understandable right now,” he argued. “Once we get all of this sorted out, then we can all focus on Bean.”

           The door opened and Dr. Mary Ludgate entered, smiling. She was younger than Regina, but had been highly recommended by Dr. Espenson when she realized Regina had stopped going to the gynecologist. Regina had confessed it was because he reminded her too much of Leopold and so Dr. Espenson had found Dr. Ludgate. She was a soft-spoken woman who had become an expert in her field despite her youth. Dr. Ludgate was also very compassionate and had worked with Regina after finding out about her traumatic past.

           Dr. Ludgate smiled as she put her blonde hair back up with a clip. “Hello, Regina. And hello, Robin.”

           “Hullo, Doctor,” he replied. “Dr. Jekyll giving you any more problems?”

           Her smile froze and it looked like fear flickered in her eyes. “He’s being handled. Thank you for asking.”

           Regina frowned, not sure that was the truth. Dr. Jekyll had been Dr. Ludgate’s partner in the practice. He had developed feelings for her which were not reciprocated and he hadn’t handled the rejection well. Dr. Ludgate wouldn’t give them specific details but she had informed them at their last visit that Dr. Jekyll was no longer with the practice and there was a restraining order out against him.

           “Well, if he does, let us know. I know people who can help you,” Robin offered.

           Dr. Ludgate thanked him before turning to Regina, her smile growing sincere again. “How are you feeling? Are you still getting sick easily throughout the day?”

           “Yes,” Regina replied. “It seems like anything will set me off. When will it be over?”

           “Soon. Morning sickness usually diminishes once you hit your second trimester,” Dr. Ludgate said.

           Relief swept through Regina. “I’m glad to hear that.”

           “In the meantime, though, I could suggest some natural remedies that can help alleviate the sickness.” Dr. Ludgate smiled as she wrapped the blood pressure cuff around Regina’ arm. “Let’s see how your blood pressure is.”

           “Probably high. Things are still stressful,” Regina admitted, having been honest about her legal problems at the first pre-natal visit.

           The doctor nodded as she monitored her blood pressure. “Understandable. But from what I’m seeing, you’re in a healthy range. I know it might still be difficult, but keep trying to keep yourself calm and out of stressful situations. Okay?”

           “Okay,” Regina said, worried about the stressful situation she was about to walk into with Leopold Blanchard as the doctor measured her abdomen.

           Dr. Ludgate went over the bloodwork Regina had gotten done earlier, smiling. “So far, so good. Now we just have to do the ultrasound. I’ll have the nurse set you up.”

           “Thank you,” Robin said, holding out his hand to help Regina down off the examination table. He laced his fingers with hers as they followed the nurse down the hall.

           Once Regina was set up with her stomach bared, the nurse smiled again. “Dr. Ludgate will be here shortly. Just relax.”

           Regina nodded as Robin took a seat next to her. He took her hand again, kissing it. “I can’t wait to hear our child’s heartbeat,” he said.

           “Me too,” she confessed. “It’s like it’s going to be real. That there really is a baby inside me and I haven’t been so sick for another reason.”

           He kissed her forehead as Dr. Ludgate entered. She took her seat and pulled out the gel. “This is going to feel cold and weird, okay?” she advised Regina.

           “Wonderful,” she replied, leaning back. Robin chuckled, kissing her hand again as Dr. Ludgate applied the gel.

           Minutes later, the screen flickered to life as she pressed the wand to Regina’s abdomen. She moved it around until finding the little blob that was their baby. Tears pricked Regina’s eyes as she whispered: “Hello, Bean.”

           “Are you ready to hear the heart?” the doctor asked. Robin and Regina nodded and soon, the sound of a rapidly beating heart filled the room.

           Unable to hold back, Regina started to sob as joy coursed through her. She glanced over at Robin, expecting to see tears as well. Instead, he frowned and looked confused. “I know a baby’s heart beats faster, but this seems even faster than I remember,” he said.

           Panic filled her and she gasped, looking at the doctor. “Is something wrong? Is it because I’m so stressed? Am I putting my baby in danger?”

           “Calm down,” Dr. Ludgate told her. “I have a theory, let me just move the wand a bit to see if I can confirm it.”

           Regina watched the screen, as the view moved from one blob to another. She clutched Robin’s hand tighter. “What’s that?”

           “That would be baby number two,” the doctor replied, smiling as her brown eyes lit up. “I must’ve had the wand in such a way that I was picking up both heartbeats.”

           It took a few seconds for Regina to process what she was saying and for her mind to make the connections. Two white blobs. Two heartbeats. Two babies. “I’m carrying twins?” she asked in a broken voice.

           Dr. Ludgate nodded and Robin chuckled. “Will is going to kill us,” he said.

           “Probably,” Regina agreed, staring at the two forms on the screen. She had stopped believing she would ever have a baby of her own. Now, she was having two.

           “Everything looks good,” Dr. Ludgate declared. “You’re healthy, both babies are healthy…Multiples do present other possible complications, so I will be monitoring you for those. But otherwise, everything is fine. I’ll see you next month and we’ll discuss determining sex, if you want.”

           “We do,” Regina said, wiping off the goo with the cloth Dr. Ludgate gave her. “Especially if we now have to plan for two.”

           Robin nodded. “We have a lot of planning to do. Everything is probably going to need to be doubled.”

           Hopping down from the examination table, Regina took his hand again. “Let’s go get my clothes and then we can all go tell everyone the good news. I want a picture of Emma’s face.”

           “I definitely don’t want a picture of Will’s face,” Robin said, shuddering. “We should probably get some armor before we tell him.”

           “Is he really going to be that bad? I mean, he adores Roland, that much is clear. Why would he be angry that we’re having twins?”

           Robin sighed. “He does love Roland like his own. However, Marian and I may have relied on him a little too much when Roland was a baby. So he’ll probably be concerned you and I will do the same, especially if we have twins.”

           She nodded, wondering how much they would end up relying on Will. “Well, I guess we can be careful about that. Or make Emma pull her weight.”

           He let out a snort of laughter, pulling Regina close to kiss her head. “How is Emma with babies?”

           “Dunno,” she admitted. “I guess we’re going to find out, huh?”

           This time, Robin let out a full laugh as he let her go. “Why don’t you get your clothes on and then I’ll take you out for some lunch? Especially now that we know you’re really eating for three.”

           “That sounds perfect,” she said, feeling giddy. “Can we also get some ice cream? These children are definitely Locksleys because I have a craving for Rocky Road.”

           “Then we are definitely stopping for some ice cream.” Robin grinned at her before she disappeared behind the curtain to get dressed.

           She took a moment to take a deep breath as she ran her hand over her bump. There were two Beans in there, both with their own little space and strong heartbeats. Regina bit her lip. She knew two babies at once was going to be a challenge but it was one she was gladly going to accept. “I can’t wait to meet you two,” she whispered to her children before pulling on her shirt so she could get something to eat.

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